blur of myself

haiz....exam is coming...
yet i din feel stress as like last time i did
coz of this..i dun really feel wan to study..
n i study just coz of dun wan get bad results...
feel guilty to myself..

i never feel like this when exam is coming..
how come this time will be like that
maybe there is nothing to push me study
as if like last time...
i will think of.. i dun wan couple influences my results
then i will study like hell~

now seems there is nothing to push me to study properly...
sometimes i also wish someone can hurt me deeply...
then i will go study crazy...
then i will feel better
*mayb other ppl will think im crazy, but i prefer that instead of like that LAZY*

somehow, i also think myself like someone...
but i noe is childish...
this is only make me more fan when exam is coming...
so just put it aside first...
discipline n control myself la.. =)

then, still need to plan for class party...
some ppl want it to be simple..buy pizzas n drinks then makan only...
some ppl want it to be fun n dun care bout subsidise
some ppl dun care..anything is ok for them..
think of so many plans jor... then coz of this..
band my idea, coz of that band my idea
ask them to plan.. say.. u plan la..
haiz... very susah la
then one day i tak tahan.... n just say out whatever i feel...
then few drops of tears came out from my eyes...
final decison is... medium level... -go picnic-
hm...finally is settled... ^^

hm...gb side...
pionner council is getting less n less ppl..
coz some need to work, some need to study
so far... only me, joanne n jennifer
every time meeting...we dunno wat duty we are having...
then last min at the band time..
i just separate the jobs to some ppl n carry out...
hope captain can cheer pioneer council up again =D

next yr, we still need to plan for combine off session meeting...
hm.. this i dun really worry...
coz got so many ppl can think of good idea together...
bb side kit ee n hong ee also every geng
esp kit ee...he helps me a lot =)
then gb side.. joanne..she really helps me a lot ^^
but seems she got something fan these while..
so dun really wan to mafan her la..

hm... hope there is someone always ready there to listen my voice =)
volunteer to lend me his @ her ears..
share all my happiness n sadness...
laughter n tears... =D

I LOVE U.....
MY FRENZ
& MY FAMILY

U ALL GIVE ME LOTS SUPORTS N ENCOURAGEMENT =)
THANK YOU <33